Free Nights

Found Poetry has won my attention lately. 

The Next Thing

The peace that surpasses all understanding, in a mysterious way, has the ability to give you what you gave up in the first place in order to receive it. "In acceptance lieth peace," said Amy Carmichael.
Is it possible that in peace lieth understanding?

We give up our desire to understand, and accept through trust..then..we receive peace, and gain understanding. 

Not a day goes by that doesn't bring  new opportunities to know Him. I recognize my chance to put into practice my obedience to Him, and I'm left with a choice. 

Day by day, I come to believe the promise is true; He cannot forget one whom He lays down His life for. I made up my mind years ago that I wanted one thing beyond all things, and that was to know Jesus. To be ruled by His love. However, more times than wanted, have I found myself under the rule of a lesser. A danger to the obedience and longings my heart and journals are so full of. 

So here I am, on U.S. soil, single, and no where near the fields or paths I've dreamt and imagined I would be upon the age 24. To Whom all desire is known, and no secrets are hidden, I bring this all to.

I come again, to believe the promise.

As a result, I find I know & understand His love a little more. The gift has kept giving.

Just like the great prophets of old asked "how, Lord?" so it is today.

 He answers with, "I AM."

I see full well that not knowing what's next is hard. I know, too, that this uncertainty can always be evaded, but if it is, my result is endless loss- for it is the cross that has come in the form of uncertainty.

I hold tight to my heart, and understand all I could be rejecting, and with both hands I pick it up. 

I do not know Thy plan for years to come,

My spirit finds in Thee its perfect home,

Sufficiency.

Lord, all my desire is before Thee now,

Lead on, no matter where, no matter how--

I trust in Thee. 

loss given

Silence, ache, and loneliness
draw tiresome
Your absence speaks mountains,
yet not words of Thy.
Imagined dreams and longings
come painfully undone
Closed eyes, tears dwelling,
O, loving promise-
suffice.
If waiting here
means more of You to come
Have I found loss given for Thee
to high a price?

We Hippie Dance

Judah & the Lion can put on a lively, soul-filled, folk to the core show. Yes. Music has once again gained more of my appreciation. Dandelion, has always been one to help me see it has as much to offer as you let it.

Penny & Sparrow opened the night with incredible voices & ended with many new fans, I'm sure.

Festivals & concerts are beyond ideal when experienced with my sister. 

The songs were felt, and the message was needed.
Just stand strong & Hold on to Hope
But when you can, just let go & do your hippie dance.

I think we are still running on the melodic therapy that Hope creates room for.
Oh boy, did we ever hippie dance.

Dandelion and Butter, natural born best friends- on adventures all around the world & back. 

Creating a Word-Picture

For a whole year they met with the church and taught a great many people. And in Antioch the disciples were first called Christians. Acts 11:26.

There was a time (most likely many) when James, the half-brother of Jesus, had to consider the cost. Perhaps, the most defining one he faced came some time after the sword of Herod took one of their own, James the brother of John.
I am learning that you can see so much by creating a word-picture. James, who is unique in relationship and background to our beloved Savior, gives us a world of room to imagine. Possibly, during this defining moment, his thoughts went something like this..

"This thing were doing is deadly. Terrifying. I feel sick. I feel exhilarated. He said not to fear those who can only fear the body. Think past the pain. What about our families? What does all this mean? I feel like hoards of demons have been unleashed on us. There are angels. Real, live angels-- and some of them appear in beams of brilliant light. We may be captured, but we may be rescued. We may see horrors, but we may see wonders. We may lose our heads, but we cannot lose our soles. The stakes are up. The fire is lit. It's time to live like those who cannot die. 

Welcome to the life of those called Christians. "

The study of James.

From Kindergarten On

My best friend since 1995 said "I do," the night of September 20th!
It was an absolute honor to stand beside her on her big day. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. It was a gift to hold her hand just moments before the ceremony and go to our Father in prayer together with gratitude. Oh my, because none of that beauty and love could have been possible without Him! It was another wedding that reminded me it is only because He loved us first that we too can love! What a beautiful Savior we have, and I know Him better because of my friendship with Jamie. His never-changing love has always been shown to me through Jamie Leigh.

This fun, loving, always smiling, one of a kind girl was a gift to many from the beginning!

Congratulations to Mr. and Mrs. Horner!

 I love you both.

For Until the Snow Starts to Fly

So, my dear Momma had another birthday Sunday. Unfortunately, things went a little different than planned after I came down with a terrible stomach virus in the middle of the night before. Momma spent the whole day and more bringing me Sprite and medicine. 
A mother's love, there is nothing like it. 

Anyways, this was the video that was meant to be played when she woke up Sunday morning. Since we couldn't all be together for her birthday, we put some love in a video! Debra K. this is for you! I hope this brings you a little love to hold you over until they get home... before the snow starts to fly:)

Happy belated birthday, and thank-you for always taking care of me! I love you!

Advice From A Tree

One thing I love about being with my wildflower sister is that we can think out loud in front of each other. We can follow each other's thoughts and build off one another's creativity. God has opened our eyes to so much more of His beauty by making us sisters.
Dandel and I have a thing for trees. Before you laugh, sit under one and think about all that this piece of life holds.
The tree has become our reminder to "trust the process." The same Creator is behind us both, and through every season and every circumstance, He takes care of it all.

While in DC, we fell in love with Advice From a Tree.

Stand Tall and Proud
Sink your roots deeply into the Earth
Reflect the light of a greater source
Think long term
Go out on a limb
Remember your place among all living beings
Embrace with joy the changing seasons
For each yields its own abundance
The Energy and Birth of Spring
The Growth and Contentment of Summer
The Wisdom to let go of leaves in the Fall
The Rest and Quiet Renewal of Winter
Feel the wind and the sun
And delight in their presence
Look up at the moon that shines down upon you
And the mystery of the stars at night.
Seek nourishment from the good things in life
Simple pleasures
Earth, fresh air, light
Be content with your natural beauty
Drink plenty of water
Let your limbs sway and dance in the breezes
Be flexible
Remember your roots
Enjoy the view.

On Repeat

Apple Bread & Rollercoasters

The K-SQUAD had a night full of laughter, dancing, and good talks. We woke up with a delicious breakfast prepared by Momma. The Church family was ecstatic to have the girls there for Sunday morning service. We hopped on a trolly towards Dollywood, and took advantage of the short lines for hours. So much fun!

True joy, the truest form of it, is only found when it is from the pursuit of another soul experiencing it.

See God in Everything

"Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of Truth." -2 Timothy 2:15

I have set this as my aim. However, first I must accept the assigned portion and cup given to me in this present moment. Do I believe all conditions of my life are God's ordained choices? Yes. So, be it; May I practice the presence of God.
To see God in everything.
I believe when we concentrate on God's approval, with a teachable spirit, we begin to desire and learn how to "rightly handle" His word in all we do. I am also a firm believer on disciplining our thoughts, and the help memorization can be. Elisabeth Elliot's writings have opened me to see that the more heavenly my thoughts the more faithfully I will perform the meanest of earthly duties and tasks.
I just recently memorized this stanza, and hung it on my wall in my room:

Teach me my God & King

in all things Thee to see,

& what I do in anything

to do it as for Thee 

"You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul and with all your mind."

-Matthew 22:37

To see, know, & experience everything with my Savior today- my prayer, my plea, my Grace given to me.

A Wise Woman Once Said

“Our loneliness can’t always be fixed, but it can always be accepted as the very will of God for now. And that turns it into something beautiful. Perhaps it is like the field wherein lies the valuable treasure, we must buy the field. It is no sun-drenched meadow embroidered with wild flowers; it is a black and empty place. But once we know it contains a jewel, the whole picture changes. The empty scrap of forgotten land suddenly teams with possibilities. Here is not only something we can accept, but something we’re selling everything to buy. In my case, selling everything meant giving up the self pity and the bitter questions. I do not mean that we’re to go out looking for chances to be as lonely as possible; I’m talking about acceptance of the inevitable. And when, through a willed act, we receive this thing we want, then loneliness, the name of the field nobody wants, is transformed into a place of hidden treasure.” 

-Elisabeth Elliot

Life-changing Words to Memorize

In Acceptance lieth peace. -Amy Carmichael 

Great thoughts beautify small tasks; I have found this to be true.

Booms Day, 2014

Today was FUN. 

Meet the K-SQUAD.

We took on Knoxville, rain & shine. 

My Happy Place

The Smoky Mt. Chimney Tops will forever be my "Happy Place."

This is the very place, I prayerfully trusted to Him my whole life, and the place I go back to often to speak with Him, reminded of how far He has brought me, how deep His healing has reached, and how worthy He is to be trusted. They will forever tell me that He is faithful, even when I am not. These rocks are where I go & He is found when I seek Him with my whole heart. It is my happy-place.

"On the mount of the Lord it shall be provided."- Gen.22:14

Today I was gifted to hike it with two very close friends, dear to my heart, and passionate about this walk of life. Kit, Karleigh, and I hiked up mid-day, catching the beautiful colors of the sky setting to give us a glimpse of the Artist behind it all.
In those colors, the ones that are never the same in any different day, we are given a look into a message from the Father that does come daily. It is the last picture He writes for us in the sky before darkness falls for the night, a message of hope that is to hold us over until He stirs the colors again before the rising sun.
The reminder that there is always a resurrection.
Behold the Creator in the sky, for it is always preparing His way, lighting our day, and Reminding us to  stay- for as sure as the sun sets, it will rise. And we watch Him paint the same glorious message, in a new uniquely beautiful, never before seen, way.

I am learning to behold Him.
For, you become what you behold.

Road Trip

Crossings staffers hit up the Holiday Inn!

Reunions with these friends are always needed, and they always open your eyes to Grace greater. It is encouraging and motivating to be reminded of the same mission we are all living for amongst so many different states. We are a team, and when we get the chance to come back together, we refuel.

This time we were brought together to celebrate the love of two of our very own, Joe & Lindsey! Two people madly in love with the Lord in one another. It was a beautiful wedding, pointing to Him as the Author of it all and Whom they were making their promise under.
Needless to say, I had tears rollin'.
Jesus you are so beautiful on display, I cannot fathom seeing you face to face!!

Congrats to the new McDonalds!:)

Side-note:
This trip also involved a reunion with my dear BethAnn, Papa Roach car jams (which only happen with BA), and a stop at Sky Zone, dressed in cat shirts. Yep. I have been graced again.

The "To-Learn-List"

Since Haiti, I have had a crave to learn multiple things. So, I made a list. I am unsure as to how successful, when, or if these things will be- but, here's to starting somewhere!

With that said, there has been an attempt of a start of one! Today, I attempted to sow my first skirt.

ta-da...

Up North

Hello Massachusetts!

Mom and I took a flight up north to surprise our AT hikers, and every minute was an adventure. This was my first time flying with my mother; I love any chance to hug my baby-brother; I enjoyed seeing Dad's new mountain-man scruff in person; I got to put more laughs with my south-african brother-in-law in the books; Lastly, could any word describe my excitement to be back with my wildflower sister?! My heart was warmed in every way.
The East TN Tribe gained a slack-packer on this trip as well:) How awesome it was to put in some miles on the AT with them! Amber and I got some incredible miles of trail-runs, we spent 8 miles trekking through a Flash Flood warning, and nature revealed the Creator to me in ways none other can. SO good.
The wilderness. Where answers are found to questions I didn't even know to ask.

“Thousands of tired, nerve-shaken, over-civilized people are beginning to find out going to the mountains is going home; that wilderness is a necessity...” -John Muir

Another Season with Grace

As I was on the plane, heading over seas to Haiti, the “going” and its unknown began to set in. All that I didn't know, and the inevitable mistakes I knew were to come, brought me a fear of doing more harm than good. As I walked through this with Him, my journal writes of His still solemn voice promising to Shepherd me. I thought of the last of my years, thanked Him and took courage. He goeth before.

As I wrote, and continue to write about this season- my words are so few and so broken as yet, but I pray that somehow He may use it to bring glory to His dear name.

This summer has been yet another season where putting into words what the Lord has taught me seems almost impossible. To write them all with a full picture of what it entailed and remains, it seems to me, would mean writing my first book. As for the time being, composing some points of this lesson filled experience may be good to start first...Besides, in more than most, He is still teaching me.

1. Pray for discernment.

2. Brokenness (i.e. poverty) must be seen as equality.

-The core reality of how one can bring “help” to others can only be understood through humility. I was asked to read the book “When Helping Hurts” before arriving in Haiti, and for this I am thankful. I would recommend it to anyone preparing for a mission field. This book began the shift of my perspective- to seek less of how “to fix the materially poor,” and more of how we can walk together, while asking God to fix us both.

3. Goliaths fall when people act in God's power.

4. Perception changes everything. 

Contentment is found when we begin seeing everything and every circumstance as either a gift, or an opportunity. Being content with what God gives us, and seeing it is enough. All is Grace.

“A glad heart makes a cheerful face.”-Proverbs 15:13

5. All the things you have been leaning on will, at some point, be knocked out from under you.

6. Evil is leaving the fountain of life and trying to find it in the broken cisterns.

“But my people have changed their glory for that which does not profit..they have committed two evils: they have forsaken me, the fountain of living waters, and hewed out cisterns for themselves, broken cisterns that can hold no water.”-Jeremiah 2:12-13

7. The Harvest always implies “time” and “perseverance.”

-Whether it is through prayer, or a physical labor, keep sowing. God has called us to long obedience in the same direction.

“And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up. So then as we have the opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith.”-Galatians 6:9-10

8. So much death= so much life.

-The life-out-of-death-cycle must proceed in our lives, if we wish to become like Christ. He was the Great Grain who died for the harvest (John 12:24). The first result is death.

“What you sow does not come to life unless it dies.”-1 Corinthians 15:36

9. God is Love.

-As I was in Haiti, the missionaries and BHM staff were walking through a John Piper study together. Joining them in this, I grew to see a greater difference between “pure love,” and “impure love.” Motives from the right heart will enable us to act from delight, not duty. Love is the overflow of abundant joy in God that meets the needs of others.

10. Know God as the Creator.

If you have yet to see God through nature, you have yet to see His infinite creativity and beauty.

11. I must focus on the Invisible.

As we lose our hold on what is visible, He becomes more precious and treasured.

“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”-Matthew 6:21

12. To learn from the ravens.

“Look at the birds of the air: they neither sow nor reap nor gather into barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not of more value than they?”

13. God loved me first.

Therefore, I love Him, too.

14. The cross cuts deep.

As He aligns our desires with His glory, our lives are tracing the cross.

Take from me, O Lord, that self-pity which love of myself so readily produces, and from the frustration of not succeeding in the world, as I would naturally desire..for these have no regard for Your glory.

15.Suffering is where the proof lies.

A place where His Word is proven true, and His promises stand any test. It is given to us to give back to Him. Our Father knows exactly what fits our frame, and what we need to experience to know Him more.

16. All is loss.

To be spent. To be broken bread. This is how life is measured- by loss and not by gain..for when we are empty of this world, we are able to be full of Him.

17. He is so much greater than I thought He was.

18. He is still El Shaddai.

The God who is enough. Into each situation, Jesus came, bringing His love, His healing, and His peace. He still comes to those who ask Him today.

19. Sing a chorus and look ahead.

Jesus survived His sufferings by the invisible, which was the joy set before Him.

We too, can survive by singing and clinging to the joy set before us.

“Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.”-Hebrews 12:2

20. He is my Greater Wealth.

Oh, to fight to treasure Him enough to die for Him.

21. Normal health and the ability to do ordinary tasks are a gift from God that we should thank Him for everyday.

22. It is good to learn to live with less.

23. Missionaries are not set apart from the human race.

I was given a great gift to watch and learn from a handful of wise and godly men and women living their lives in Haiti to serve. Their humility and teaching continuously reminded me of something I once read from Amy Carmichael's missionary journals:

“Don't imagine that by crossing the sea and landing on a foreign shore and learning a foreign lingo you burst the bonds of outer sin and hatch yourself a cherubim.”

24. The best position I can be in is to be ready, with open hands.

A pure readiness to give oneself away, at any moment He calls.

25. Teach me Thy way Lord, the rest can wait.  

The Rest Can Wait.

GRACE. It has come in so many ways! Morgan, and the friendship that is so perfectly equipping..The Baptist Haiti Mission staff, who welcomed me gladly, and teaches me daily..God's work being done here, and the incredible opportunity to join in on it..the beauty, the culture, the lessons, familiar faces, new faces, and so much more- it is all a making this a season of growth.
I cannot seem to process the right words to explain all that Haiti has been to me, already. Hopefully soon, I will be able to write more of what is all else happening on this trip..but as of now, there is only one explanation and sum of it all that I can make clear of-- and that is simply, Jesus. I see where He has built on top of so many things in my life in preparation and intent for what He's revealing to my heart here. I see His grace daily, and my selfishness disappear within it. I see His love bigger, and His plan nothing like my own. I see His timing beyond perfect, and His creativity to be infinite. I see His promises stand unmoving, and His heart beat in creation.
The Lord has revealed to me the power of perspective. Every circumstance, hardship, joy, place, etc, can either be a gift, or an opportunity. If this is how we decide to see things, life becomes nothing less than a win; both views cultivate an attitude of contentment and gratitude. As I begin to practice this in my own life, I see a pattern of humility, sovereignty, and Love. In return, it changes everything- that including my mission as He calls me.
My perspective should not be that of how to fix or better the world and it's people around me, but to acknowledge I too am broken, and in need of restoration; reality then becomes a prayer for not "them" but a prayer for "us." My areas of mending may be different than his, hers, or yours, however, it does not change the compared amount of which I need Christ- it is all equally abundant. As Christians, is it not our ambition to see all made right in relationship with God, to be restored to His likeness where we recognize our worth and purpose in His glorious plan? Christ is not just walking along side me, and in return I am walking along side another- no, He is walking along side the both of us, withholding all the  necessities for the joy-filled life. Perspective changes everything.
Lord, teach me Thy way. The rest can wait.

Here We Go, Haiti.

Oh, to be hands and feet. It's here again. The Lord has lead me to another trip across waters; He has brought me again to the call-- to love His people in the country of Haiti. As I sit in the airport I can't understand how He could look upon me and find me worthy for this opportunity. Grace. His Grace is so big. Word's cannot describe how excited I am for these days ahead of me. There are so many faces there becoming more and more familiar to me, and more of their stories growing deeper in my heart. To hug them and know them more, is nothing I can put into words. I am looking forward to writing about all He brings me to, teaches me, and more. May I walk His story, and bring only Him glory.

"He wanted His people to 'loose the chains of injustice,' and not just go to the church on Sunday. He wanted His people to 'clothe the naked,' and not just attend midweek prayer meeting. He wanted His people to 'spend themselves on behalf of the hungry,' and not just sing praise music." -When Helping Hurts

Friends

This past week has had a common theme for me; you could say, a great reminder of life essentials. I have once again been reminded of God's love through relationship.

I have gotten to FaceTime both my sister away on the AT, and my best friends away working at camp; I spent the weekend celebrating Jamie's engagement with girls I have loved since kindergarten; I even received letters and care-packages in the mail, and that doesn't even cover it all. So, here I am filled with love from all these people, ready to pour it all out-- that's how God works. Relationships are the doors He comes from, the paths to find Him, and the tools He uses. It still amazes me how energizing service out of love can be. When Jesus resides in our very core, we cannot help but be attracted to the dying of self; we want to care beyond our own needs, and we desire to be apart of something that benefits what is past us. I say 'want' because we are still yet to be made perfect by Him, but our hope remains enough right now- hope that this life we are living is worth more than days on this earth... a promise that we await. The picture of true love cannot be seen, it cannot be felt, or it cannot be acted upon without relationship. The people in my life are nothing but good and perfect gifts- all apart of His plan.

7 days Until Haiti

The feeding of the 5000 has once again popped up into my reading, and time spent with Him. May I continue to learn offering up what I have and letting God transform it for the good of others.

I see, if you really want to experience God- then go, love his people. 

What is more important than the world seeing Him? 

Jezi se sel espwa. Jesus is my only hope.

Sister Smirks

I got to FaceTime the thruhiker world's kindest tonight. She filled me in on her latest Native-American reading, organic-farming day, and even introduced me to a chicken named Helen. Dad, Stacey, Mom, and the cats all joined our date at some point, making my heart even more full. I have really enjoyed living vicariously through my family as they tread along the Appalachian Trail thus far. I am looking forward to the possibility of putting in some miles with them after I return from Haiti. Missing this wildflower lots, thanking Him for her, and sending hugs to Maine.

Father Pedro Arrupe

Nothing is more practical than finding God, that is, than falling in love in a quite absolute, final way. What you are in love with, what seizes your imagination, will affect everything. It will decide what will get you out of bed in the morning, what you will do with your evenings, how you will spend your weekends, what you read, who you know, what breaks your heart, and what amazes you with joy and gratitude. Fall in love, and it will decide everything. 

Bad-Weather as a Dad

Today, the East TN Tribe of 5 enjoyed lunch and nap time on Moxie Bald.

I have a trail-dad.

One whom is currently walking south for 2,000 plus miles, finding adventure in the wilderness, and taking in glimpses of God's glory through creation all along the way.

More specifically, I have a trail-dad who, when in the woods, goes by the name of "Bad-weather." 

(Try topping that for third grade show-in-tell).

Today was Father's Day, and considering my dad has taken on the Appalachian Trail, our usual Cracker-Barrel celebration date has been post-poned for a couple months, or so. As a result, it was all-in-all a day no out of the ordinary as another (although, I did enjoy more time with my sweet mother, which I am always thankful for).  Out of all the Father's Day I have celebrated, this year I am the most grateful; and I don't know whether to call it sad, or not, at the fact that it took these weeks away from him to see it all. We laugh because I have somewhat stepped in to handle all of dad's regular house care and errands while he's gone- and let's just say I fall quite short of them all. My mowing may be getting better, and I hope to throw the trash in the right dumpster next time, but there is still so many obvious areas that show momma and I are missing our chief. If you know my dad, you know what joy he is to have around, the laughter he can bring, and the deep caring heart he has that always makes you want to be a better person. 

At church this morning we sang the beautiful, and so fitting, hymn of "Higher Ground." The piano began to play, and momma leaned over and said, "This always reminds me of your dad." She could not be more right. 

"I'm pressing on the upward way,

New heights I'm gaining every day;

Still praying as I'm onward bound,

Lord, plant my feet on higher ground."

This is my dad's heart. From what I understand, the Appalachian Trail is just as much as a spiritual journey as it is physical. 

"My heart has no desire to stay

Where doubts arise and fears dismay;

Though some may dwell where those abound,

My prayer, my aim, is higher ground.

Momma and I have many different jobs on the home-side of the AT journey, and that includes prayer, and lots of it. As long as thing journey continues, as will our prayers, and today this song became just that.

"I want to scale the utmost height

And catch a gleam of glory bright;

But still I'll pray till heav'n Ive found, 

Lord, plant my feet on higher ground."

How wondrous God must look from the top of Mt. Katahdin, how beautiful He must sound through the  falls and wildlife, and how refreshing He must feel through the revealing of His glory in every step. The key point is that none of this could/can be experienced without the pursuit of "new heights." Higher ground is found by scaling the "utmost height." Doubts and fears are inevitable in this life, but in order to catch that gleam of glory bright, we must stay onward bound.

I have a trail-dad, and his aim is higher ground.

Happy Father's Day, Bad-Weather. 

"And God saw everything that He had made, and behold, it was very good." -Genesis 1:31

The 100 Mile Wilderness

The name alone, “The 100 Mile Wilderness,” gives you a sense of weight and hesitation; it seems to illuminate for me a understanding of that which is not easy, convenient, or comforting. These four words are something my mind has repeated and thought on often this past week. My dear and adventurous family have left for their journey along the Appalachian Trail, leaving the house, four cats, and a dog, all to my sweet mother and I. For as long as I can remember my dad has dreamt of this 6 month hike, and it didn’t take my sister and brother long to begin dreaming it as well. Since then, my sister’s husband and my little cousin have taken on the adventure with them. Now, the time for the 5 of them to leave has finally came as to about a week ago, and here I sit- surrounded by cats, sore from mowing the lawn, and googling the nearest dumpsters for tomorrow’s trash duty. Is this a place every college graduate finds themselves in, or is this just me? Regardless, it is safe to say I have launched into a new season of my life, and it is full of lessons.

“The 100 Mile Wilderness” has seemed to be a lesson itself, for me these past few days. This is the northernmost part of the Appalachian Trail, and is currently the section my family is passing through now. If you Google this trek you might find descriptions such as: one of the most remote trails in the United states, uninhabited, seldom traveled, harsh contrasts, and unforgiving to the ill-prepared. Make no mistake about it, this is nature in the raw. This rough and narrow path is surrounded by 15 million acres of inaccessible woodlands- making it a hearty test of their physical strength and commitment within. We are to assume that the average length it’ll take our hikers to get through this stretch is around ten days. That is usually 10 days of no contact being made with them. However, we were lucky today to receive a small update! Thank you, Lord! This came as a such a surprise and great excitement for us family members back home. I am proud to hear they are 56 miles deep in this challenge and doing well! The trail was said to be pretty tough, however, with much “mud & muck, blow downs, and stream crossins,” (if you put it in dad’s words), all resulting in a slow trek. Their spirits seemed high and full of laughter though, which was so good for us back home to hear. We were also told that tonight they were getting the chance to take their first bath of their trip- in a lake! Sheww, what a bunch. I will definitely be sending them deodorant in their next package…I just need to find the vegan kind for Amber..somewhere… By the way, Dad sent word she was a pretty tough girl;) That’s my wildflower. I am so proud of them all.

Although, we got a a bit of word from them tonight, the past few days of no contact has given my mind free range to think of all the different circumstances they could be in. At the end of it all, I always come back to the question, “how?” How can one want to walk through 100 miles of straight wearying and rigorous wilderness (not to mention- still have over 2,000 miles to go afterwards)?

I have come to believe the answer is found more in not the “how” but the “why.” I am sure there are endless varieties of reasons “why” that have crossed through Maine’s wilderness path, but I believe those reasons were the very thing that kept them going: their goal, their focus, their purpose..their reward. The more I think about it, I realize this is a question we can all ask ourselves; perhaps we are all walking, or being called, to a 100 Mile Wilderness. We may not be asked, “what are you walking for,” but more so “what are you living for?”

This is a question I find that constantly points me to my Light. As for myself, I see my purpose here on this earth to glorify my creator- by loving Him and loving His people. It is in His midst that I find my hope, perseverance, and worth. Therefore, as I go through “100 miles of wilderness,” wether it be a day’s worth or a month, a heavy burden or light affliction, my purpose remains, pushing me forward. I think of how beautiful and thrilling the end of this stretch is going to be for my hikers; how rejuvenated and encouraged they will be to move on; and how thankful and satisfied they will be with what was accomplished. Just like the sun must die in the west if it is to rise in the east, we must endure to receive the reward in full. You hear the analogy all the time; let us not forget the climb up the mountain is what sets us on it’s top.

One of the boldest things Christ taught us on the cross was that suffering is directly linked to glory. Is it possible this is just the thought we have forgotten? Hardship, even the smallest scale of it- waiting, discomfort, setbacks, disruptions, or whatever may not seem to line up with our wishes- we want none of it. We then are left only to find ourselves short of what we once saw lying ahead, no closer to our pursuit, and at a standstill of believing above our fears.

My family is walking right now, through what many of us choose not to tolerate, for we look at it as inconvenient. Therefore, I have learned from them this week, to pinpoint my wilderness and walk- looking at it only as the path to my reward.

Hold tight to what is coming, pursue it passionately, and believe far above what you may fear. I can walk through the wilderness, but it takes a steady fixing of my gaze on the cross- what I am living for.

K-Love Fan Awards

Momma and I decided it was probably best for us to have a little trip of our own as the rest of the family left for the Appalachian Trail- you know, maybe to help ease the good-bye pains a little bit. The K-Love Fan awards was the perfect mother-daughter trip, too. We had a blast; there was always something going on for you to get into. I think we saw over 30 live bands? The speakers were great, and time was well-spent. Mom even participated in her first 5k run! I was so proud..and how fitting that the run benefit was the children of Haiti:)

Same Gospel, One Mission, Different Places

Departing ways for the summer from hearts of iron and love. Oh, how I will miss them- but He is enough for us.
Elisabeth Elliot & Amy Carmichael-

"Missionary work is a grain of sand, the work untouched is a pyramid...face it. Look and listen, alone with God. But never, never, never, think that anything short of this is being 'interested' in missions. Never, until this point is reached and passed, delude yourself into believing you care at all... She brought her friends, girlfriends, and cousins at home to consider the cry and the call, to welcome all tests of whatever sort before they crossed the seas, and to learn to die to self in any shape or form. experience had quickly taught her that she could not survive the storms without the anchor of the constraining love of Christ and what she called the "Rock consciousness of the promise given to her."

  He goeth before. 

Walking Sobo

Appalachian Trail Shake-down #1.

33 days until my adventurous family leaves for Maine.

Follow them at opalandwonder.blogspot.com! Or by the AT tab :)

Katie from Korea

I have three conversation partners from Korea this year, and they are awesome! I have loved getting to know them, and have learned so much from them as well. I picked the girls up and brought them back to my apartment, for dinner again. However, this time they wanted to be the cooks. I can now officially say I have had real Korean food, and to my surprise- loved it. We had to make a Food City run beforehand, to pick up some rice, and on the way back we ended up having a long talk in the car about relationships. One of the girls, had asked me if I was dating anyone and after I answered “I am not” they asked if I would explain to them why. I found this difficult at first, for I wondered if it was a reason that even many Americans would struggle understanding. I also did not want them thinking it was a “religious” reason; I wanted them to see that it was because of my love for the Lord and my trust in Him as a product of that, not a rule of some sort. I decided to start off with first explaining my desire to follow the Lord's will, and how that meant trusting Him with every aspect of my life. I told them that if I really believed that He know's best for me and desires best for me, then there were many things that I had to stop trying to control myself- and who I was to date and marry was one of those things. I went on to try and explain how it took me a while to learn that God would bring someone in my life when He saw fit, and until then He was blessing me with time to fall in love with Himself. I have found the single life to be that of a gift, and in return have realized it is a gift full of many more wrapped within it. The girls opened up a lot during that conversation in the car, and from what I understand, it is a rare concept in Korea as well. We talked about the gospel and how it seems that relationship verses religion is not only an American struggle. I told them I wasn't perfect at trusting in God and struggled more than not on the whole journey, but I was warned it would be that way, and promised it would be worth it. All in all, we had a great time, ate some amazing food, and swapped a little bit of cultures. They truly are beautiful girls, inside and out.

Mary's Treasure

 Luke 2:1-20

 “But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” -Luke 2:19

We could learn a lot from the life of Mary. A great number of people believed that Jesus was their Savior, however, is it possible this woman was one who knew without any disbelief? Every human heart aches to see what Mary did. This is a woman who raised our great Messiah; who heard His first words, saw His first step, and tucked Him at night – the One who was promised to come. Through out the scriptures we see how she experienced God in ways that go deeper than the words we read. Luke 2 holds some of her incredible experiences, that if one looks closely, you can see how they all fit together for one remarkable picture.

In verse 19, we are told that, “Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart.” She valued them. She saw them as something precious and worth keeping. Why? What is the significance in doing this? To ponder something means to reflect, mull over, and meditate on as a whole. As a mother, Mary held all her pondering thoughts of her child, and the experiences God had brought her to with Him, together. The confusing moments, the fear, the joy, the pain, the rejoicing, all of it was God's plan for a whole picture – His faithfulness. God is the common factor in every experience, stitching them all together with His faithfulness. We too, are at places in life to ponder, just like Mary was. Take the time to look back on all life's experiences that have brought you to this very moment- the good, the suffering, the misunderstood- all of it. If we do not look at God's work as a whole, then we will never understand His love in this life- His completeness. When we “treasure up all these things in our hearts and ponder” on them ofter, we will remain in hopes that God has been faithful and He will continue to be.

And as a result of these pondering experiences, Mary shows us:

She grew to know Him.

She grew to love Him.

She showed the true value and treasure of this world.

She sat at His feet.

She went to His word.

She listened to His teaching.

She saw His glory.

Every human heart aches to see what Mary did. Please do no miss such an important element in Mary's story. Try a new way of looking at things- as a whole – Great is His faithfulness!

Princess Weekend, 2014

Back to Haiti

I don't know how to wrap my mind around my heart's pull to the Haitian people, but I can't fight it. This week deepened my love for God and His people, especially those outside the American walls. I long to be a missionary for the Lord, crossing any border with the Good News as my march. I am seeing more how to "seek eternal life," and the Lord has graciously given me the desire for it.
I was comforted this week by the love of the children wrapped around me. Loving them made everything right in the world.

He has shown me the call is greater than my need to be comfortable.